yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
