Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Randomize
