i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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