but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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