we have pet lesbian snakes
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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