He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
