My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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