let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
