the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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