Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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