I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
