with your own penis?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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