I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
me + whiskey = a bad person
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
