how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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