You work out of a Hotel?
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize