HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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