Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
