How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
