k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
