Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
