He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
