I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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