but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
