i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
