Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
