Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
