Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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