hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize