Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
