Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I've blown a few things in my day
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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