I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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