Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
