That's intense
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
