There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize
