Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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