Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
