Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
only if we run a train.
done.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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