Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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