my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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