im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
