He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize