just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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