I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
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