Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
