If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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