curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
