i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
