I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
