i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
