just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
