Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
